Third trimester, the husband meets the first lover, continues or gives up?

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 Third trimester, the husband meets the first lover, continues or gives up?


Q: My wife and I have been married for eight years, and my child will soon be in grade one. Recently, I feel that my wife treats my colleagues more than I and my children. She often says that she doesnt feel good for me. After listening, she is very sad. What should I do?

Xie Jichun

Beijing cuckoo psychological counseling center

A: Everything has a good side and a bad side. Youve already said the bad side. On the bright side, she can directly tell you I dont feel any more about you and you can see that she is more attentive to her colleagues than to her family.

You may ask, how is this good?

There are two reasons:

1u3001 Good is relative. At least she expresses her feelings directly, which is much better than repressing and holding back until the outbreak.

2u3001 What can be said and done openly is much lower risk of cheating and empathy than that of concealment and careful concealment.

Although you are sad to hear what she said,

But on the whole, things are not beyond redemption,

For example,

But you feel and appreciate how important her feelings are to you,

And then I came for help,

For example,

According to the above logic, there are two ways of thinking.

One is to tell her how much you care about her, and how sad and jealous you are.

Just like when in love, some girls deliberately get close to other men, just want to make her boyfriend sad and jealous, and then love her more?

I think you havent expressed love with your wife for a long time.

In addition, tell her that you have to ask for help because of this trouble. Maybe she will laugh at you, but knowing your attention and heart should make her happy.

My husband met his first love

Q: I am now in the third trimester of pregnancy. Not long ago, my husband met his lover in junior high school. They have been in contact with each other and have expressed their feelings to each other. My husband even wants to be with her, but he is worried that there will be various problems in reality. Now my husband will still care about me, but he still cant let go of his first love. I dont want to keep this state. What should I do?

Xie Jichun

I just dont know,

For you dont want to continue this state, I understand that no matter how calm you are, you must be suffering physically and mentally.

But its hard to achieve because half of the determinants are in your husband.

Theres no guarantee that youll be able to do what you want with any coping strategy.

You can have the following several ways to deal with it, but not limited to this. Each person, each couples situation is different, can not be listed one by one.

It may be because the wife pays more attention to the children at this time, which leads to the loss of men. You can talk about the reasons for this.

Give each other some time.

Experience tells me that when many people ask questions, they already have their own opinions.

Can a stranger, even a counselor, know more about himself than you do?

Can you make the decision for you?