How can my parents persuade me to marry far away?

category:Lady
 How can my parents persuade me to marry far away?


Thank you for writing down your valuable suggestions on todays emotional problems.

Beauty for help:

My boyfriend and I met when we were working part-time in college. It was 17 years. I was a junior and he just graduated.

He is two years older than me. We are all junior college students. The place is in the city where I go to school.

However, my parents went out to work in the early years, and the houses in my hometown were demolished. Now I bought a house with a loan in Xinjiang, which can be regarded as settling in Xinjiang.

Before graduation, he had been living in his uncles home, and occasionally went to Xinjiang to stay for some time.

My family is in a small village in Shanxi Province, only my sister and I have two children. My father has always felt that it is his regret that he has no son.

However, we have never been treated unfairly because of this. My family is in business. The county has bought a house with all the money, and there is also a house in the village.

The reason is that my boyfriend is a stranger. On the one hand, one of my familys relatives married to Sichuan more than ten years ago. After divorce and remarriage, he was not happy.

So they objected and let me go back to my hometown for fear that I would go away with my boyfriend in Taiyuan.

Then my father also stayed in the hospital and had surgery. At that time, my boyfriends home said that as long as my parents agreed, they could live in Shanxi and buy a house.

I told my parents they thought it was empty talk, and then they forced me to break up.

In order to stay in Taiyuan and not go back to my hometown, I can only cheat them to break up.

But I was afraid that they would not agree with me. They would force me to go back to my hometown. I was also afraid that my father would be angry,

Their temper is very stubborn, tell them well, they will only be good for me, let me go back home.

My boyfriend majored in animal husbandry, so its hard to find a job. In recent years, he has been working in Sichuan, Xinjiang and Shanxi.

I have done a lot of work, but they are not stable. We have always been in different places. There are many civil servants and teachers in his family.

Now because I didnt agree with him, he went back to his hometown to test public institutions in order to make money stably.

My sister and brother-in-law are teachers in the establishment, and many of our relatives work in state posts,

So my parents also hope that I can go back to my hometown to take the exam. But after I graduated from accounting, I always insisted on working outside, and they gradually accepted it.

But when they say they want to find an outsider, they still want me to go back to their hometown and stay with them. They are afraid that I will go away and leave them.

I really dont know what to do now. I should wait until my boyfriend has some financial foundation to tell my parents,

Or tell my parents now, wait until they agree.

This matter has always been a thorn in my heart. I hope mu mu can give me some advice.

Do you think I should have passed the test and show them that I have the ability to give themselves a good life in the future, so that they can rest assured.

Reply:

First of all, you need to understand clearly whether your parents oppose you with a strong and absolute attitude or a consultative attitude.

The most important point is that your boyfriend is a stranger. At the same time, with his current ability, your parents feel that he cant take care of you or that he cant give you good living conditions.

Especially when your work is getting better and your ability is better, I think your parents will be more against it.

Because regardless of whether your parents are biased or correct, no one wants their daughter to marry a person who is not as good as himself.

If your parents are tough and absolute, then they are stubborn parents.

Its not easy for such parents to tell the truth and try to persuade them, especially if they have a lesson from their relatives. It happens that your boyfriend is from that place again.

In their bone impression, they already have a big prejudice against the people in your boyfriends area.

Whats more, if you get the certificate, your boyfriend still doesnt have a decent and stable job at least in the eyes of the elders.

The result is bound to worsen the situation. There is already prejudice. Now there is one more marriage. You have to shoulder the familys economic worries.

Of course, I dont mean to advise you to give up the certificate. This is your professional capital. No matter how you end up with your boyfriend, dont give up and make yourself better.

Then look for opportunities to be open to your parents and show them as much as you can about your boyfriend.

But this time can not be delayed for too long, because in the face of parents who are too stubborn, no one can be convinced.

So you have to do well in your mind, and you may have to face the situation of one of two choices in the end.

The longer you delay, the greater the damage to the three parties.

So, you can delay, say, a year and a half, and give a deadline to change the status quo.

At that time, your boyfriends career is still unchanged. Should I confess to my parents or should I,

However, if your parents always tend to discuss suggestions with you, it will be more hopeful and more difficult to persuade.

Instead, its better to express their determination with their parents as soon as possible.

When they are against you and list all kinds of reasons, the more silent you are, the more hesitant You are,

The more they will be sure that your relationship is not strong at all, and the more they will feel that you are not sure you can live a happy life.

Just be brave and tell your parents about your relationship status and marriage plan, and move them with your firm and firm belief.

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