There are three levels of maturity, but most people are at the bottom

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 There are three levels of maturity, but most people are at the bottom


These are very typical and universal binary opposition world outlook. People who hold this world view are the vast majority of the population. They are used to making either or or black or white judgments, judgments or decisions in their life and work, just like this commentator.

One of the marks of a persons maturity is that he no longer uses this world view to see the world, problems, others and himself.

From this perspective, a persons maturity can be divided into three levels:

Level two: there is a gray zone between black and white, advocating gray philosophy.

Level three: the two poles are the positive and negative sides of a thing. The positive and negative are originally one and can be transformed into each other.

- the first level -

Two poles of clarity

As a result, everything and people in this world can be divided into two opposite sides.

When this kind of education from small to large penetrates into our minds and hearts and gradually consolidates, it will form a world outlook with clear two poles in everything.

I have seen such a manager in the workplace. When she thinks that a subordinate is good, she will give her heavy responsibilities and praise. If this subordinate has one or two things that cant be done well, she will immediately put her into the Eighteen hell. Whats more, Ive seen her treat her subordinates like this more than once, either holding them to the sky or letting them leave immediately.

One of her subordinates did not develop well for many years after she was forced to leave. Every time we chatted, she would talk about the contrast between the two and ask, why did she do that to me? After that, I always felt like a failure.

Although the manager is in a high position, he has been treating his team and subordinates from the perspective of good or bad. There is no middle ground.

The consequence of this is that it is difficult for her to be a good manager, and at the same time, she unconsciously hurts everyone in the team.

After all, the world is complex and fast changing, and people are also complex and multifaceted. Therefore, if one is always looking at the world and people operating according to the complex mode from the perspective of simple mode, he will not be able to see clearly, and naturally he will be very sad.

Gray Philosophy

Most people stay at the first level all their life. Those who can come to the second level are already very powerful people. They are people who hold the gray philosophy.

Within Huawei, there is a principle of gray philosophy, which is not black or white, but a fusion of white and black thinking.

Ren Zhengfei once said: in the process of change, any black and white views are easy to inspire peoples hearts. We just dont need black or white views. What we need is gray views and seek a balance between black and white.

In essence, gray philosophy is a mode of thinking that correctly reflects the objective world and the actual situation.

Huaweis gray philosophy contains two meanings. On the one hand, it can speak of gray in strategy and tactics, and on the other hand, it needs to speak of gray level to people. Here, I would like to talk about the gray view of people.

I would like to give an example of this perspective. This example is about Martin Luther King, the famous leader of the black movement.

But are the previous views and the present ones correct and objective?

Obviously not. To say that he is God or scum is to see only one side of him.

And the real objective and mature view is: Martin Luther King is a man, so he is certainly not perfect. He is contradictory, but his love is beyond doubt.

There are also some people who hold this view, such as Marshall fradi, who wrote in the preface of the biography of Martin Luther King: regardless of all the reverence and praise for king, the real and comprehensive King finally gives us the enlightenment that how painful and complex the moral hero - our Prophet - actually shows before us is Its a mysterious mixture of good and evil.

This kind of evaluation is grayscale, pertinent and realistic, because the world we live in is real and complex, and human nature is also complex and multifaceted.

The soul of Martin Luther King is single and flat. However, the real situation is that Kings soul has always been three-dimensional and complex. He is much more complicated and painful than the flat image created when people deified him on a large scale.

In todays era, it has become easier and easier to comment on a person. Everyone can evaluate others at will, or easily define others, saying that he is a hero or a rogue, and that he is a God or scum.

In fact, the second level is already a world view very close to the real and complex world. If you can not only see this layer, but also see the mutual transformation between black and white, that is a higher realm, in which you can view yourself and the world from a longer time perspective and a broader spatial perspective. This is the third level.

Laozi said, misfortune is the place where happiness depends, and where misfortune lies. It is said that there will be mutual transformation between blessing and disaster.

Happiness and disaster are two poles of a state. How can they transform into each other?

On this point, Han Feizis explanation is: when people are in trouble, they are afraid of fear; when they are afraid of fear, they are upright; when they are upright, they are thoughtful; when they are mature, they are reasonable. If a man is blessed, he will be rich and noble; if he is rich and noble, his clothes and food will be beautiful, and his pride will be born; if he is arrogant, he will go astray and abandon reason.

From this explanation, we can see that the reason for the mutual transformation between blessing and disaster is that the weakness of human nature has brought about the change of psychological state, and a series of changes have taken place.

In fact, there is also a very important underlying logic, that is: if you put a thing in a long enough period of time or enough space, its transformation will almost certainly happen.

This is exactly what the story of a blessing in disguise expresses

Saiwengs horse ran to the residence of the Hu people, and he lost his horse.

So, people came to comfort him, but the old man said, how come this is not a blessing?

A few months later, the lost horse came back with many good horses, and people came to congratulate him.

Later, the old mans son broke his leg on horseback, and people came to comfort him.

The old man said, why is this not a good thing?

For example, the highest level of the six hexagrams in qiangua says that Kang long has regrets..

Another example: in the book of changes, there are two hexagrams: no and Tai. It means that if a thing is strong to the extreme, then it will not be far away from the time of decline. If he is unlucky to the extreme, then it will not be far away from getting better. Therefore, they will say prosperity and decline, adversity brings prosperity.

Zhuangzi also wrote a similar point of view in Qi Wu Lun: things are nothing but that, things are nothing but being, from that they are not seen, and knowing oneself is knowing them.

Through this sentence, he wants to tell us that there are relations between that and this and yes and non in all things in the world. They are interdependent and transform each other. Therefore, there is no permanent, final and comprehensive conclusion on all things. Everyone has his own prejudice, has his own set of right and wrong standards, affirming or denying others, which are one-sided from the nature of things.

When I use this way of thinking and mental model to think, I found that: in fact, everyone has no so-called advantages and disadvantages, but only characteristics. Because the advantages and disadvantages are the two sides of a body of characteristics. They seem to be opposite, but in fact they are related and can be transformed into each other.

Some peoples shortcomings are strong, like to make decisions, and regardless of other peoples opposition. But if you look at it from the other side, this shortcoming may be just an advantage, namely commanding. In other words, this person has a clear point of view and a decisive decision-making, so he is able to overcome all opinions and lead the overall situation.

Some peoples weakness is prudence. They are cautious in everything and like to act after careful consideration. In many peoples opinion, this is the embodiment of lack of action and courage. However, if you go to the other side of prudence, you will find that it can become a full advantage - it can help you avoid possible risks and crises, and keep you in a relatively safe area.

Surplus and deficiency are not opposites, but the two sides of the moon, which transform each other. Rising and retreating are not opposites, but two sides of the sea water, transforming each other without dividing each other.

Last words

See here, I do not know how much you will score for your mental maturity?

But in fact, it doesnt matter what the score is. What matters is: what level do you want to go to? What kind of thinking and behavior changes do you want to achieve that level?

Finally, I would like to send you a poem by Rumi:

There is another place besides the idea of right and wrong. I will meet you there. When the soul lies down on the grass there, the world is too full to talk about. Ideas, language, and even the word each other have no meaning

Author: AI Fei, &CEO, the founder of the vigorous school, only the best seller, the essence of the life, the personal coach of &CEO, the Gallup global certification coach, the international Coaches Association (ICF) certification professional training, the former US Fortune 500 company, the head of the greater China market, and the official account of the 200 thousand reader, Ai Fei. The ideal of is the founder and main writer.