I have a person in my heart. I have loved him for ten years. I dont know what to do now?
I want to get a divorce, but my family doesnt support it. I think marriage is just making ends meet. I also think that he is not young, the family conditions are not good, I and his divorce will harm him, but not divorce, I do not want to give him a child, I am very distressed, so please consult.
Cold love reply:
There are many points worthy of analysis in this story. Today, we will share two enlightening aspects for most readers
First, any choice, whether financial or emotional, is usually linked to risk and return.
As we all know, when we go to the bank to deposit a sum of money, the income will be very stable, there is not too much risk, but the income is very low.
If you buy financial products or stocks, the return may be higher, but the risk is also increasing.
At the same time, they may also lose a lot, or even lose all.
In essence, this is the development process from saving ability to investment ability.
Its the same in love. For a woman, her husband is like a typical choice with low income and strong certainty.
If the female owner goes to the person who has been in love for ten years, of course, she may have a good result of the prince and the princess will live together from now on; but she may also have negative income and lose all her money in the end.
Because she may find that the other party doesnt love her at all, just her wishful thinking, or really close to her, only to find that the person she has loved for 10 years is totally different from what she imagined. These are all possible things.
In the present relationship, the income is low but the certainty is strong;
Going to a new relationship has high returns, but high risks and low certainty.
At this time, some readers may ask us a question: why dont you give the questioner an answer and help them make a choice?
The answer is, peoples risk models are not the same, how to choose?
Everyone will only choose what is within the scope of their own risk tolerance.
Second, from the three stages of life growth we talked about in the past: survival, development and understanding, what the woman wants is a life in the development stage and a love fruit.
However, her family and her husband are still in the survival stage, and all they want is peace.
So her family will tell her that getting married is just making ends meet.
Her husband may also feel puzzled - why does his wife think about some irrelevant things all day long? Of course, he would not understand.
However, the woman needs to be clear about one thing: although she is ambitious at this time, her ability has not kept up with her.
What time is quiet, maybe its just her husband and her family are carrying weight for her.
If she can face the life of firewood, rice, oil, salt, soy sauce, vinegar and tea by herself, and can carry these things to ensure the safety of her life, then she will have the capital to pursue the love she wants.
If these little things in life, she can not carry, no ability, it is not to talk about the pursuit of their own love fruit.
Therefore, do you want to have a baby now is just a phenomenon. The phenomenon that the woman is in charge of her body is actually reminding her that what she wants in her heart is a love.
But obviously, if you want to pick this love fruit, it is impossible to take some risks and have no ability.
I personally feel that the best way to make yourself not regret in life is to fight for it. Its hard work.
Just like a woman owner, she can at least try to find a job to see if she can afford to live a life that she wants to pursue.
Its not too late to pursue what you want.
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