He planned to buy a house before, but I refused to pay the loan together. Later, I felt that he didnt care about me. He quarreled and moved his hand. He made up his mind to leave me and said he didnt like me since then.
Recently, when I mentioned marriage, he said he would not consider it for the time being. He hesitated even if he had agreed to go back to his hometown to get married.
I guess he thinks Im not motivated because I dont have a job recently, and hes getting better and better as a lawyer recently, and he doesnt like me any more.
Recently, because of his predecessor, I had a quarrel with him. He felt that I always wanted to control him, which made him feel terrible. He was angry that I went to add his ex girlfriend wechat, and delayed him to see the client, saying that my small chest and nose collapsed or something. In short, I cant dislike me now.
I also pestered him for two days. He said that he would let me support him unconditionally, but I was scared. I was afraid that he would develop later, and I would not stand beside him after that. Can I still make him like it?
He is now back to me is busy, something, dont always chase him to ask questions, with the leadership and so on. Although he asked me to support him, I always felt that he was using reconciliation to force me to leave quietly, because he said that reconciliation was a chance for me, and he just wanted to get along quietly.
Moreover, he said that he had thought about four problems in choosing a marriage partner: 1. Be nice to him; 2. Bear family responsibilities; 3. Act as lubricant for the two families; 4. Be able to handle the relationship between his family and his family.
He said that the above four points do not have confidence in me, and his current thinking is the same as that of me before considering whether he is suitable for me.
Appeal: 1. At present, our growth is not synchronized, is there any hope? Do we have room? 3. What can I do to get him to say the real reason why he wants to break up? 4. If you continue, how can you change your mistakes?
First of all, the core problem of this story is the mismatch between the needs of both sides.
This boy, what he wants is more than the exchange of two people.
If you dont want to have a relationship, you have to spend money to buy gifts for each other to find a balance. You dont want to be controlled all day, and you dont want the so-called synchronous development.
Maybe he wants something deeper.
Secondly, the girl asked an interesting question. She said, what can I do to get him to tell me the real reason why he wants to break up?
I would like to say that one should have self-knowledge and a clear understanding of relationships.
In fact, we dont have to let the boy say that as a spectator, we can see a lot of reasons why the other party wants to leave.
As an example, in the description, the hostess said such a sentence: quarreled and moved his hands. He made up his mind to leave me and said that he did not like me since then.
It must not be as simple as the boy quarreled and beat the girl.
Because if so, the girl in the description will say he raped me.. There wont be the so-called boys say they dont like me since then..
Therefore, the real reason why the female owner wants to know is that this boy has already made it very clear.
When did he start to dislike the mistress?
It was the woman who started to hit him.
What he wants is a woman who supports him, a woman who is good to him and who can handle relationships well.
As a lawyer, this boy was beaten by his girlfriend. What kind of experience is it?
Its just that sometimes we dont want to see the truth.
Third, there is a more important reason for choosing this story because it is a large-scale revenge demonstration site.
One of the things a normal person will do is that after he is hurt, if he has the ability to retaliate, he will certainly retaliate.
In the past, he couldnt get revenge because he was too weak. Now the power is reversed. The girl is in a hurry to be with this boy.
So, the boy put forward a big revenge, called: I want to be single for a year, you support me unconditionally, and then we get married..
The so-called single year is self-evident, that is, the hostess can not control him, he can play every day, and then two people get married a year later.
He wants to use this years torture for his own willingness.
Therefore, no matter whether we are boys or girls, we must understand that no matter whether we are in love, whether we are married or not, as long as we establish a close relationship, there will be a pattern of power.
The party with the advantage of power structure should not abuse their power and bully the other party with their own power.
Because in the future, once the power is reversed, the other side will usually have a big revenge.
We have to pay all the debts we owe. Its not that we dont report them, but the time has not come.
We must take this as a warning, be vigilant and vigilant again.