Is such a boyfriend mean?

 Is such a boyfriend mean?

After dinner, a student quietly settled the bill. After we knew it, we strongly asked the student to send the bill to him. My best friend gave me a red envelope. I also asked my boyfriend not to ask for my girlfriends money. He said to accept it.

It was said that three people would pay together. I actually wanted my boyfriend to perform in front of her best friend, but I didnt expect that he didnt do it.

When I proposed to share the money with them, he didnt say Ill give you this one. Instead, he accepted the red envelope sent by my best friend and me. I felt very uncomfortable and felt that he was very stingy;

3. When I get along with each other, I think he is not stingy. Since we were together, he paid for dinner almost every day, and I would pay for it several times.

Because its not good to always ask him to pay. Sometimes he will buy me food, shoes, bags and lipsticks for me, because I have to go out for exams frequently. Basically, as long as he has nothing to do, he will drive with me;

4. He is a good person, but every time I go out to spend money, I feel that what he does is not very pleasant to me. I dont know if I think much or if he is really like this.

These things really make me feel like a stick in my throat. I really hope you can give me some advice. I think its going to explode every day.

Generals reply:

On the issue of spending money, I dont think your boyfriend is stingy. On the contrary, I think he is very clean, and the terminology is clear-cut.

What you are puzzled about is why he is generous to you sometimes and seems to be stingy at other times.

The point is that the scenes and boundaries of time and time are different. Generally speaking, the scope of your boyfriends spending is within your relationship.

For example, when you two eat, its within the scope of the relationship. Hes very generous to buy bags, shoes and lipsticks for you. Its also a gift in a relationship. Hes not stingy.

But its you who buy cosmetics. Its your personal consumption, not the cost of love. If you invite students to dinner with your best friend, you are teachers. You express your personal feelings, and you are not consumption based on love relationship.

He should not be responsible for these two sums of money, or the consumption outside the love relationship.

What you are not satisfied with him is not that he is not generous. You are more face saving.

When shopping outside, if your boyfriend takes the initiative to pay for you, you will feel like you have face in front of the shop assistant. When you mention that you want your boyfriend to perform in front of your best friend, you just want to have face in front of your girlfriend.

Its not that theres anything wrong with being face saving, but you all invite students to dinner as teachers. In this scene, its not about face, its different. If its just three of you eating together, its reasonable for your boyfriend to invite a guest.

If you say that even if your boyfriend pays for you, you wont agree, then why pursue formalism?

Now that Im talking about this topic, Id like to talk about my thoughts.

Its very common for lovers to shop together. But if they dont live together or get married, and the money is not spent together, its suggested that you should pay for your own things. No one owes anyone. The relationship between the two parties is relatively equal, and they will go for a long time.

Finally, on the issue of face, I would like to add that everyone needs face, but face can also be earned for themselves.

No matter who you go shopping with, you can pay for the things you like, instead of relying on others to swipe your card. This is Beier has face!