Maturity is the ability to empty yourself

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 Maturity is the ability to empty yourself


The computer has been used for a long time, because there are a lot of system garbage and debris, which need to be cleaned up regularly.

In fact, people are the same. In the past experience, there will be many problems, even psychological trauma, which has not been dealt with in time, and has become our spiritual burden.

For example, more and more people are suffering from depression.

Depression is an emotion that points to the past.

In short, a large part of the reason why people feel depressed is that they cant let go of what has happened.

And the main reason why I cant let go is because of self blame, guilt and even thinking that Im guilty.

02

Here, were going to talk about guilt in detail.

Guilt is a strong emotional experience of uneasiness, shame and guilt caused by actual or imagined mistakes or crimes.

First of all, proper guilt is healthy, and also a reflection of ones moral values.

In life, we will inevitably make some mistakes and hurt some people.

For example, as parents lose temper with their children, or as friends, we misunderstand the good intentions of others, and we will feel guilty at this time.

Guilt will remind us to be a good person, a person who can think for others, so that we can have more intimate and high-quality relationships with others.

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But guilt, once excessive, can become a bad thing. It will make a person in a kind of uneasiness and pain for a long time and become a poison on the soul.

Especially for some people with a good heart and a strong sense of morality, when they hurt others because of their own mistakes, it is difficult to put down the burden of guilt.

In their consciousness, the world is black and white, right is right, wrong is wrong. There is a strict set of right and wrong standards in the whole world, and everyone should follow this standard.

Therefore, it is a serious mistake to hurt others, which they cant bear.

So, how to eliminate this guilt?

One of the ways people often use in life is: not to forgive themselves, to abandon themselves.

In the film the new police story, Jackie Chan plays Chen Guorong, a legendary figure in the police force. In his years of working as a police officer, his detection rate is 100%, and his popularity is unmatched.

However, in the process of handling a case, because of a moment of carelessness, he was trapped by criminals, leading to the killing of many brothers around him.

The reason for this is that guilt is a destructive force. To ease the guilt, one needs to be punished by the person who has done wrong, and this person is himself. Therefore, only by abandoning oneself and making himself live a bad and unhappy life will he feel punished and feel better.

Many people with depression are so deeply immersed in the vortex of guilt and self sin that they are hard to extricate themselves.

Therefore, if you want to avoid depression and make your life more relaxed and happy, you need to clear up those problems and burdens accumulated in your heart in time.

How to do it?

In real life, no one is perfect, and no one has never made any mistakes.

Those who pursue perfectionism, on the surface, are pursuing perfection, but in fact they are avoiding problems and afraid of making mistakes.

This may be due to some bad experiences in their childhood, such as once they make mistakes, they will be criticized or even punished by their parents.

However, the value of life is to create something valuable in countless problems and chaos.

Making mistakes is not a persons failure, but a normal in life. Learn to accept your own imperfections. If we dont make mistakes, we will see them as important steps in life.

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Dont blame yourself too much for the past. Its not your fault

It is necessary to bear the corresponding responsibility for the past mistakes. However, for many people who are used to taking responsibility for themselves, they should also pay attention to asking themselves when problems arise

Did you cause it directly or indirectly? Did you do it intentionally or unintentionally? You have different responsibilities for different reasons. If its not directly caused by you, and the result is not your intention, then tell yourself: its not your fault.

Life in the past is a wake-up call. Its not about sticking to it and paying for the past at the expense of the present and the future.

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At the end of Hayao Miyazakis film thousand and one thousand, Xiaobai said this sentence when sending Chihiro back to the real world

Dont live in the past all the time.

Only by saying goodbye to the past bravely can we have a better future.

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