CHEN Ye is a beautiful woman in her early 30s, working in a cultural unit. Four years ago, her husband had to divorce him because of his unscrupulous behavior. CHEN Yes unit is in the western suburbs, and her home is in the eastern suburbs. In order to live, she has to take her young son from Jingdong to Jingxi, and then from Jingxi to Jingdong. Looking at CHEN Yes haggard face, her colleagues and friends advise her to find a suitable man to start a family as soon as possible. But in the four years after her divorce, she never got married again.
On the afternoon of the weekend, I called CHEN Ye and told her that if I had time to visit her tonight, she agreed.
When I arrived at her home, she had already prepared a table of Sichuan dishes for me. CHEN Ye is a woman of great charm. Her fine brushwork is exquisite and moving. She is also good at dressing. She also cooks authentic Sichuan cuisine.
After dinner, her son was doing kindergarten homework on the desk in his bedroom. We sat on the carpet in the living room and chatted about our family. Of course, my topic is still inseparable from her marriage. After she poured me a cup of hot tea, she sat in front of me and talked quietly.
She hasnt stopped looking for a boyfriend for years. Among them, she was introduced by her parents colleagues and helped by some friends. She even went to the marriage agency. In total, she met seventeen or eight people. However, I want to look for the kind of man who can love himself and her son, but also can live a down-to-earth life, never appeared. She said that two years ago, a friend introduced her to a senior editor who was nine years older than her, who agreed to meet her after looking at her photo. He was a tall man with a pair of golden glasses on his nose. As soon as we met, she was satisfied with the mans appearance. However, in the process of their conversation, she found that the man was particularly concerned about her health and what kind of food she could cook. She especially asked if she had learned massage. The man said that he had cervical and stomach diseases and needed a woman who could massage and cook. When she heard these words, she had an indescribable taste in her heart. However, she did not immediately refuse the matter at that time, because she really needed a husband, and her vanity made her feel strongly in favor of the mans work and status. However, after careful consideration for a week, she refused. She said there were many similar situations, and of course, it hit her the most. She didnt want to see any men for a long time.
Last year, she talked about another friend, whom she got to know at a party with a friend. This is a young man who works in the radio station three years younger than her. She is also divorced. The young man liked her very much and pursued her closely, but she always kept a vigilance and did not dare to put in the truth. Because, she thinks the young mans condition is better than her, the reason is that she has a child, but the young man has not. In the process of the young mans constant pursuit, the young mans family entrusted her unit to investigate her performance and the reasons for her divorce. She was very angry when she learned of this situation, and then she cut off contact with the young man. The young mans various explanations did not help. She said, sister Ning, if I develop with him or get married, will the marriage last for a long time? Im not sure at all.
Listening to her talk, my heart also heavy up, I can only say: dont lose heart, the situation will get better.
Where is the end
When I met her, she had just divorced, and she was often accompanied by a chubby little girl, her daughter. Ji Lingling is a hot and spicy woman who dares to love and hate. Soon after her divorce, she fell in love with a member of the orchestra. For a while, she was very emotional and busy. It is said that the performer has a 17-8-year-old daughter. Ji Lingling often takes her with her when she goes out to perform and buys beautiful clothes for the girl. Seeing that the performers home was so simple and cold that she moved all her furniture and other valuable things to the performers house, covered the girl with the soft satin quilt she used when she married, and even gave her jewelry to wear. However, before long, Ji Lingling returned to Beijing ahead of schedule when she went to perform in the south. When she returned to the home of the performer who was about to become her family, she was shocked and another woman came out of the players arms. So, Ji Lingling made a big noise and asked the moving company to move all her furniture property back to her home.
A year later, she met Mr. Li, who had just returned from Japan to visit relatives. When she and Li were talking about marriage, people who knew her felt that they were incompatible, not to mention their age difference of more than ten years. From the perspective of temperament, the overseas Chinese in Japan was just a northeast old farmer with sorghum seeds on his head. However, they really went to the red carpet. Ji Lingling once gave me her candy and showed me the big red wedding certificate. Since it is already like this, of course I want to bless them. Later, I heard that she followed Mr. Li to Japan. Later, we lost contact.
One day, I came back from an interview and was passing through the underground passage of Dongdan. Suddenly, a man grabbed my arm and gave a yah sound. I was startled. When I looked up, a woman in red covered my eyes, and Ji Linglings breath surrounded me. So we went to a quiet little restaurant on the street, and we had a conversation while eating.
She said that she divorced the overseas Chinese in Japan. Because of the great difference in age and the nature of her work, the husband was always worried about her. Wherever she went, he would follow her. If the tracking failed, he would get angry and even fight. Once he went to the regiment to chase her. She gave up all rights and went back to her half room. But soon, Mr. Li got a stroke. He asked his friend to ask her to go back. Her heart softened. She carried her own clothes and went into Mr. Lis red yurt. After more than half a years careful care, he basically recovered. After his health recovered, his spleen qi increased day by day, and he became suspicious all day long. She did not let Ji Lingling go out of the house When someone called her, he thought it was a bad man who seduced his woman, and it was a fight again. In the unbearable circumstances, Ji Lingling once again filed for divorce, and once again returned to her own home alone. I deeply sympathized with her and asked politely, Li must have a lot of savings after staying in Japan for several years. Did he express any feelings when he got divorced? She said: he has grasped the money to death, learned Japanese thrift, when we live together, he never bought food in the refrigerator, if I dont buy it, we wont eat it. He never told me how much money he had, and never gave me a cent. We were silent and I didnt know how to persuade her.
Who knows the right and wrong of marriage
Once, I called Mo Huas newspaper office to look for her. I was writing an article about music. I wanted to ask her to help me find some materials. She agreed and asked me to pick it up at her home. So, she and I had a chance to have a deep talk. One of the differences between my ex husband and I is that he thinks I should, like all wives, make him a cup of tea after work every day, and then go into the kitchen to stir fry a few dishes and have a drink, she said. Its too vulgar to bear. Why cant we eat convenience food? Tomato burger with salad dressing? Why cant we have a restaurant? We have enough money to spend, but we have to go to the farmers market to bargain with the farmers for ten cents. Im really blushing for such a life.
Shuining, are you satisfied with your marriage? Dont answer me. Ill let you answer yourself. Do you think marriage gives you more or deprives you of much? You dont have to answer that. We are about to enter the 21st century. If our ideas are not changed, I think the proportion of people who do not marry or divorce will increase in the future. This is not sensational, but empirical. The highest realm of human beings is freedom, which is the largest space for obtaining the soul, while some marriages control this free space. Therefore, modern people are struggling to find such a space. When marriage is not suitable, we can only break the marriage. I listened quietly
Mo Huas theory has also been seriously considered.