Xiao Wei got married two years ago. After marriage, her husbands food and clothing are almost all arranged by her. For example, what clothes her husband will wear the next day, she will fold them up and put them beside the bed the night before, and now her husband is lying on the sofa lazily playing games.
In such a life, we can only say that one is willing to fight and the other is willing to suffer. However, we are at peace and enjoy ourselves. Until the baby was born, Xiao Wei was even more exhausted. Every cry of the child, she was so nervous that she could not wait to make the child comfortable.
From nursing, sleeping and changing diapers, all of them are done by themselves. At the same time, she still remembers to do everything for her husband, but she doesnt understand that she feels so considerate. Why does her husband always quarrel with her? It wasnt like that before.
When two people, one pays and the other receives. Its simple. But after the children came out, there were more and more people in the family at this time, and Xiaowei was still treated in the same manner and manner as before, which would inevitably cause others, such as mother-in-law, the feeling of how can I seem to be redundant.
What Xiaowei didnt realize was that she did everything without giving others the choice.
What I dont understand is that the premise of love yourself as yourself is to learn how to love yourself first, and then I can love others when I realize it.
If we sacrifice ourselves to love others, what that love can only give others is moving tears and heavy burden; what she needs is not to grow up fast, or to do more and better; but to try to let go, have a good rest and take care of ourselves first.
The meaning of life is to be yourself; the value of marriage is to be the best yourself.
Marriage needs two-way pay, one-sided completion, the outcome is often unexpected.
Wives with savior feelings tend to create these two types of husbands: the shake off type and the dependent type.
When the wife has done everything well, the husband has no room to interfere. Naturally, she doesnt need to toss about by herself and form a habit over time. Also, because the wife is excessively capable, the husband begins to rely on her after getting used to it.
If its just like this, the marriage relationship is OK, but people are emotional people after all. When we see that our husband is used to it sometimes, we dont feel like it. We feel that he doesnt care about things. Its not pleasant to think that hes not good. When theres a contradiction, the quarrel will come naturally.
But what we cant see is that our husbands are all spoiled by ourselves.
Friend Leer always complains about her husbands laziness and asks him to do some work. If you dont say that he can see the work he needs to do, you can say that he moves a little.
Isnt it right for me to point out that he didnt do a good job?
The woman with saviors feelings always has a mind that cant be finished and cant let go of the work. Sometimes she even looks at her husbands clumsy work and hates to go up on her own. When she is finished, she is not satisfied and will do it again.
Over time, the fun between husband and wife will be worn out in these trivial things.
Therefore, the woman of saviors feelings always wants to do everything properly by herself. However, such feelings seem to bear everything, but actually exclude her family from the scope of common help. Respect your husband, sometimes let him do something, from another point of view is also the way to teach him.
Put down the saviors mentality so that you dont have to be responsible for your husbands emotions; put down the saviors feelings so that you can grow up together and complete each other in your marriage.
In marriage, the husband and wife who grow up together often have tacit understanding at the end.
Frank and Claire in the American play house of cards give us a typical answer. They play the complex and multifaceted nature of the relationship to the extreme.
In the vast crowd, its not other people, but the powerful man outside who loves Claire more deeply than sharks love blood. Its the elegant and sexy intellectual woman who quietly ignites Franks inner energy.
Two excellent people never refuse to grow up together. Even though there are some different views on the way to a happy marriage, they finally choose each other.
Therefore, in a good marriage, there should be a proper distance between husband and wife, as well as their own burdens. In front of her husband, the wife has the responsibilities of both the big woman and the little woman. You are my husband and you are my darling.
A family, a marriage, husband, wife and children, and often savior feelings on the establishment of family relations, is unbalanced. Because sometimes, what husband and wife do is not important, what kind of attitude to live is important; how much money we earn is not important, we love each other is important.
A truly happy marriage always requires the husband and wife to make progress and grow up together.
There is no constant happiness in the world, only the mentality of achieving each other; there is no permanent marriage, only the husband and wife who grow up together. The bond of marriage is not children, not money, but the common growth of spirit.
Put down the feelings of the savior, we will find that the marriage is suddenly open, and people are relaxed.
I wish I could have one heart and one white head. We come to this world, after decades of hard work, if we can achieve such a result, it will be a kind of success.