Leng Jing: recalling my fathers cold habits

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 Leng Jing: recalling my fathers cold habits


I remember that my father often asked us to sit and stand and stand. We cant stand on our legs. We should take the initiative to lay the dishes before the meal. After the meal is served, adults do not move the chopsticks. Children are not allowed to eat first. When eating, we are not allowed to shake our mouths. Our left hand holds the bowl and the right hand holds the chopsticks. When we eat soup, we can not make any noise. We can only pick the dishes in front of us. We are not allowed to pick the dishes from the east to the West. We are not allowed to insert the chopsticks in the meal and shake our legs. When you see the elderly, you need to be called you. Age: how old are you this year? Whats your last name? Do not use the word hello when calling.

New years Eve is more complicated and restrained I remember clearly that when my family was still living in Lius old house under the boiler in the old town of Wuning, on the first day of the new year, I woke up in the same bed with Guo Xinxin, my little neighbor, and went to look for the lucky money wrapped under the pillow by my parents after we fell asleep on New Years Eve. According to the old people, it is necessary to prevent children from waking up in the morning of the first day of the Lunar New Year and from saying something unlucky without brushing their teeth and washing their faces. If children with red envelopes are happy, they wont say anything. At that time, there were two yuan and five yuan red envelopes. After finding the red bag under the pillow, we danced excitedly on the bed and sang the selected part of the classic north wind blowing from the opera white haired girl for Chinese New Year. Maybe we were dazed by the red envelope, and sang the tragic aria that the protagonist Xier cried her father Yang Bailao was killed. We were immediately scolded by our parents. They said that if we sing around again at the beginning of the new year, we will take back the red envelopes. It scared us to hide in the quilt and make strange faces with our tongues. We never dared to make a sound again. This funny and embarrassing childhood story is the most impressive in my childhood memory.

When we see the children and my grandchildren in the new year, we will think of the interesting story of our childhood when we are happy to receive the red envelope! In a flash More than half a century passed like this!

When we were young, our father taught us to recite hundreds of family names and three character scriptures, as well as 24 solar terms of a year, and 12 months of easy to remember and smooth words: 1, 3, 5, 7, 8, 10, La (LA is December), 31 is not bad; 4, 6, 9, winter (winter is November) 30, only February is 28.

More than 50 years later, I still calculate the size of the month according to this. From this, I deeply realized that the distance and knowledge I learned as a child were deeply rooted and benefited for a lifetime.

No matter how the society develops, some old rules and regulations still need to be used for reference and advocated when educating children.

The fathers older generation are thrifty and hard-working. On the rest day, I took a group of kids from my brother and sisters neighborhood to go up the mountain to cut firewood and plant vegetables. They taught us a lot of life skills by hand.

My father is a pastry master of Wuning food factory. He is very skilled. In that era of material shortage, unlike now, everything can be bought, and delicious food is made at home. Although everyone was very poor at that time, the people who had worked hard for a year would save the delicious food for the new year.

I get up in the morning and wipe my hazy eyes. It seems that I have arrived at the food factory. The house is full of fragrance. There are many kinds of cakes stacked in piles, such as sesame slices, frozen rice candy, peanut candy, sesame balls, and thin layers of cloud cake, dotted with dotted red and green silk. They are good-looking and delicious. There are also big and bulging glutinous rice snow dates, wrapped with caramel and wide mouth A bite, sweet and loose, chirping, eating half of the face are sticky rice dregs.

Every half month before the new years Eve, parents help their friends and relatives make new years cakes at home almost every night, year after year. For this reason, they worked hard all night and sacrificed a lot of rest time. Their father made cakes and their mother helped them. They had to be busy until the eve of new years Eve (the 29th year of the year). Finally, it was their turn to be their own. Although the house is full of food, my parents have told me that we are not allowed to eat other peoples food. They said that it was prepared by other peoples families for the new years Eve, and occasionally they only gave some cake bits and pieces to taste. Emphasize and tell us that when we make our own home, you can eat whatever you like.

I remember waking up in the middle of the night and going to the toilet, I often saw my parents stay up all night under the dim 15 watt light in the kitchen.

Later, when the economic conditions at home were better, my father would roll the dough for us to eat. After he mixed the flour with water and alkali, he kneaded the dough with both hands and repeatedly rolled the dough with two rolling sticks for many times. The dough magically turned into a large piece of dough, which was folded into a long trapezoid shape, and then the noodles were as thin as silk. Then pour on the prepared five flavor soy sauce, add lard and sprinkle with scallion. The noodles taste fragrant, with alkali and toughness. In that year, the fragrance of a family will spread all over the neighborhood, and the mother will serve a bowl to the neighbors for everyone to taste.

The clear soup made by my father himself is also unforgettable and delicious. The skin of the clear soup made by my father is as thin as paper; when my father packs the clear soup, he moves quickly, so fast that we cant see it. He picks meat with his right hand and pinches it with his left hand, which is like assembly line operation. In a few minutes, a pile of noodles has been wrapped in front of us. We can use the ingredients to cook noodles to give each of us a bowl. Its fragrant. When we smell the fragrance, it burns our mouth again, and the saliva flows out first.

On the Lantern Festival, my father made us another Lantern Festival (Tangyuan). Looking at each small white ball, in his hand, the bamboo strip drying plate rotates clockwise by a large margin, gradually rolling larger and larger. We opened our mouths and watched, screaming in surprise and excitement. On the Mid Autumn Festival, my father also made mooncakes for the whole family. The ones with lard and sesame fillings were knocked out from the wooden model by my father at the same time. In my mind, I imagined that the twins were born, arranged in rows one by one, and painted with a layer of oil with a small brush on them, just like making up. Each of them was shining with oil. I couldnt help looking at them.

After fathers death, we never had the special taste of these cakes again. Sometimes nostalgic I will follow my fathers teaching to learn how to make, or go to a restaurant to eat a cake, but it cant be as beautiful and sweet as my fathers, the taste is engraved on my heart, and I will never forget it.

Perhaps, this is the father love!

My father always works conscientiously and seriously. He always goes to work half an hour ahead of time. He goes to the factory to do preparatory work. Everything he does is to strive for perfection and never carelessness. This also afflicts those apprentices he brings with him. They dare not laugh or slack off when they work.

In those hard and long years, my father worked hard with a meager salary of more than 40 yuan per month. My mother also worked hard in the dark, leaving early and returning late. Together, we raised several brothers and sisters and maintained the life of five or six people in our family. Parents work hard at work. After work, they take us to chop firewood, carry water and raise pigs. These high-intensity physical work in our family can help our parents share some when we grow up.

Although the father is very strict, we are afraid of him, but he loves his childrens heart, even though I was small at that time, I could still feel it. Sometimes when he comes back from the outside, he will mysteriously let us guess, and at the same time, he will take out some snacks from his pocket that others have given him and are reluctant to eat, and give us a little surprise! In the difficult times of the sixties, he would occasionally come back to the restaurant to buy bowl noodles and make a tooth sacrifice for the whole family. After his parents only tasted the salt, they let our brothers and sisters share it.

Father has been used to working all his life. He continued to work after retirement, taking our family to grow sweet potatoes, cultivate vegetables, cut firewood on the mountain, raise pigs for buckwheat, etc., which also taught our brothers and sisters a lot of labor skills.

With his strong arms and mountain like love, my father raised our family hard and let us fight and grow up in suffering and labor. Although we are short of food and clothing, we have worked hard with our parents since childhood. With the pace of our youth, we have also cultivated a good physique, inherited the fathers labor loving and hardworking personality, thrifty and strong character and helpfulness.

With the passage of time, our brothers and sisters gradually plump and grow up; reluctantly left their parents, left the trace of my childhood growth, the distant hometown of Wuning.

Gradually the father is old, still very active, he can do his best in time, never trouble others. After his mother died in 1984, his father, in his seventies, insisted on crutches and went out to buy rice and vegetables. He has been to Dexing, where I work many times. The longest and last time was in 1985. My father lived in Dexing for nearly one year when he was 75 years old. Although my father is old, he has never enjoyed much happiness in my family.

More than 30 years ago, my husband studied medicine outside China for five years. I raised two young children on one salary. I washed, cooked and educated my children every day. I still had to go to work. Its hard to live and hard to work. I didnt have much time and energy or financial ability to serve my old father. At that time, my own salary was very low, and I had to buy pork, eggs, tofu, etc. with tickets. I could only eat one or two meals at home in a month. Father is used to hard life and doesnt care about the difficulty of life. He said that he was too lonely and speechless in Wunings home alone. I took two children with me. I also wanted to come to Dexing to be my partner and help take care of my family together. He will help me to wash, cut and prepare the dishes before I leave work, build a chicken house in the yard, and repair the daily appliances at home. The kitchen knife at home always helps me sharpen it so that I can use it easily.

Every day after I go to work and the children go to school, he goes to Dexing City street alone for a walk. When he comes home, he is tired. When he passes my office, he will come in and have a rest. He will sit next to me and watch me busy in the office. He cant insert a few words, that is, he will look at me silently.

When I send him out, I will go through the small market at the gate. When I meet someone who sells local snacks, he wants to buy them for him to taste. He is afraid that I will spend money, but at the same time he will block and yearn for them. When I couldnt screw it out, I finally bought some to taste. When I get home, my father will evaluate these snacks with me, including the taste, appearance, formula and his suggestions. Its a lifelong career habit.

My father last came to my Dexing home, probably from the summer of 1995 to the Spring Festival of 1996. My son picked him up from Wuning on his way home during the summer vacation of University. At that time, he was 86 years old. He was still interested in making all kinds of home cakes for the new year, and was eager to guide his neighbors to learn how to make pastries. After the neighbors tasted it, they couldnt believe that it was a cake made by an old man. Everyone in the neighborhood was full of praise.

The last time my father quarreled to go back to Wunings hometown, the reason was that when he went downstairs, he suddenly felt his limbs disobeyed. He hurried to the hospital for examination and found that it was cerebral thrombosis. My husband is a doctor. He massages and does acupuncture and massage at home every day. In addition, he works all year round and has good physical quality. After a month, he basically recovers. Because of his old age and illness, he never came to my Dexing home again after this departure.

On the Qingming Festival in 1999, I went back to Wuning to visit my mothers grave. I saw my father go to the table to get a cup of tea and fall to the ground. He fell ill again and was admitted to the hospital again. He had a strong vitality and was discharged from the hospital again and again when he was old. This time, I took care of him in the daytime after he was discharged from the hospital. At night, I borrowed money from my friend Yujies house downstairs. At that time, he was very confident in life. He often told me that the house had been demolished. You are still living in someone elses house. After he moved to the new house, he hopes that I can continue to take care of him. He hopes that I can buy a wheelchair and push him to the street everyday. More than a month later, when I was going back to Wuning, he was reluctant to give up and wanted to talk again. I looked back downstairs and saw the window upstairs. My father slept at the balcony window on the north side of the fifth floor, holding the window, holding up his head and watching me go far away. I can fully understand his thoughts at that time. This is my fathers last look.

His father was paralyzed and bedridden for more than eight months, which was a kind of fatal destruction for him who loved work and was active and strong all his life. Although his father was taken full care of by his family, he finally lost the faith of surviving because he could not bear the pain and did not hope for his own physical recovery. He did not insist on the day when he demolished the new house. He died on December 19, 1999, at the age of 89.

I didnt see my father at last when I went back to my hometown. All I saw was his face. I havent seen him in a few months. The old father who came into my eyes was as skinny as a wood. He was just like two people before me. He didnt have a vivid appearance. I was heartbroken and cried loudly!

On the eve of the Qingming Festival in 2015, the Civil Affairs Department of Wuning informed us that my fathers earth tomb would be cremated and moved to Wuning cemetery. I went back to my hometown of Wuning once. On the day of Qingming, I specially prepared a new house for my father, which he had been looking forward to staying in. Together with my two younger brothers and two nephews, I prayed in front of his fathers grave, set off firecrackers and burned the house and money paper. On that day, smoke and paper scraps fluttered in the wind, accompanied by loud firecrackers, I meditated in my heart, hoping that my father would be able to receive them all in the sky.

When the grave moving workers pushed the tombstone together, I felt heartbroken He turned his head and tried to bear back tears. He was reluctant to let the world grieve and sulk. He stained the bones of his fathers poor life and hoped that he would be peaceful in heaven.

Sixteen years later, I witnessed my fathers remains and remains. My fathers big hand and big foot in his whole life showed in front of my eyes. Wearing dark blue hat, dark Zhongshan suit, black leather shoes, as well as our familiar presbyopia glasses, watches, etc., are all at a glance in the coffin.

While waiting for his old mans remains to be cremated in the funeral parlor, I witnessed the scene of other children who had just lost their parents, tearing their hearts and lungs and crying on their parents remains. I feel the scene, tears, this pain I have experienced twice, can not bear to see again. I quietly back to the door, tears can not stop the long flow

On that day, at a glance, there was no wind, grass, or silence on the hillside of the cemetery. People were swarming with paper flowers, and there were continuous firecrackers. In the same way, people worship and remember their relatives in heaven, add soil, hoe grass, arrange flowers and burn paper, and express their grief. There are two wild geese circling in the sky. Frightened by the sound of firecrackers, they whine and circle in the sky. They seem to echo the traffic on the ground and the people who rush to and leave in a hurry.

On that day, our brothers and sisters, according to local customs, stabbed their fingers and dripping blood on their fathers remains before cremation. With his fathers remains turned to ashes, may the father bless the future generations in heaven to be prosperous and safe!

After the cremation, my fathers ashes were placed in a row of small cells in the cemetery area of Wuning. Since then, I have no chance to pull grass and add soil to my fathers cemetery.

So far, my mother has been away from me for 31 years, and my father has been dead for 16 years. Fathers life is an ordinary and laborious one. In the hearts of our children, the image of the father is always so great. His great figure in middle age taught us the harsh words, and his trembling look in old age is forever engraved in our hearts.

Without parents, there would be no distant home. Without parents, there would be no yearning and concern, no waiting for parents to rely on their door for reunion during the new year, no reason for I go back to see my parents, no chance to show filial piety to my parents and give them gifts they never dared to think of in their whole life. Without the expectation of eating the meals made by parents themselves and eating dumplings (Reunion) for the Lantern Festival, some Only this continuous memory and endless missing!!

Now, I often caress the remains of my parents for a long time. I have thousands of words in my heart, but I cant express them or talk about filial piety. I deeply miss my parents. Every time I see that my friends parents are still alive and able to enjoy their old age healthily and happily, my heart is not only envied but also envied, more of which is my guilt, regret and regret! The older you get, the deeper you get!

After my parents brought us up, I left them and went to work and live far away.

At that time, I had 24 days of home leave a year. I was fond of playing when I was young. I only knew how to call friends when I came home, but I didnt accompany my parents more. After we got married, our parents devoted themselves to helping take care of our children. However, we were busy with our work and neglected that our parents suffered from illness. In the difficult times when we are old and young, we dont have much time and economic conditions to filial piety to our parents; when we still have fathers love and mothers love, we cant wait without cherishing them and growing old. When we have happiness, but because we dont know how to cherish it, we will know how valuable it is after losing our relatives. These are the great regrets of life

Its a pity that people forget the cruelty of the passage of time, the transience of life, and the unrequited kindness of nurturing in the world. Parents are so sincere, in their childrens cry of regret, with deep nostalgia for their children, death cant let go of the worry, leaving their children with guilt that can never be repaid, leaving us forever.

When I wrote this article, I choked several times and couldnt go on writing. From time to time, I take a look at the old fathers portrait beside the desk, which gives me confidence to finish it firmly. When I think of my old father holding the window and raising his head to see me at the last sight of my long journey, and when I think of the unforgettable moment when I saw his remains, I will cry again and again There are some things that we cant understand when we are young. When we understand, we are no longer young. There are some things in the world that can be retrieved, and some things that can never be made up. This is the biggest regret in life! I love you, my old father! Fathers love lasts forever, and his kindness is like a mountain! Written in Shanghai on June 21, 2015, fathers day by lengjing, Wuning source: responsible editor of public news: Chen Tiqiang_ NB6485

When I wrote this article, I choked several times and couldnt go on writing. From time to time, I take a look at the old fathers portrait beside the desk, which gives me confidence to finish it firmly. When I think of my old father holding the window and raising his head to see me at the last sight of my long journey, and when I think of the unforgettable moment when I saw his remains, I will cry again and again

This is the biggest regret in life!

I love you, my old father!

Fathers love lasts forever, and his kindness is like a mountain!

Wuning lengjing

Fathers day, June 21, 2015, Shanghai