This is also the case between lovers. Ignorant love germinates in the heart, and all thoughts and thoughts are beautiful. But once two people love deeply and put all their feelings into it, they will gradually get tired and return to normal.
From the point of view of physics, nothing in the world is eternal. If it flows, it will flow away. If it blooms, it will wither.
This is the law of nature.
Feeling is like a physical parabola. When you meet a person from the plane, you are full of joy. Then you walk through the wave crest and leave a beautiful trace. Then you fall down slowly and return to the plane.
But this is actually a good thing. Although love is sweet, it is impractical to float in the air, so people always say fireworks are easy to cool.
And the problem we need to solve today is this: how to deal with the feelings after the period of passionate love?
Does love need a sense of distance?
Jin Chengwu once lamented in Chongqing forest that pineapple cans will expire, so will autumn swordfish, and even fresh-keeping paper has a shelf life, as if nothing is eternal.
In fact, this kind of grievance is hypocritical, even the little bourgeois moan without illness.
Eternity is only a relative concept. For example, a star will not move for ten thousand years, but its reference objects will move, close to and distant from each other, which will form a distance. But if both stars dont move, they cant intersect and can only be parallel.
Love is not like this!
If you fall in love with a cold person, he always stands in place, energy consumption unchanged, in a narrow sense, he is eternal, because he will not love you. No love, no hate, no love, no hate, no fate.
Then all the emotions generated by your single love are personal. Its unfair for him to blame it on the loved one. Because hes not involved in your feelings.
But once two people come together and fall in love with each other, they will surely walk through the physical parabola.
The bad boy Ethan Hawke made love trilogy 25 years ago, including love before dawn, love at sunset and love before midnight. Jesse and Selena are in love all the time.
You have to ask, how did they do it?
Very simply, this movie has been made for 18 years, every 9 years, and each story has only one day. That is to say, Jesse and Selena are together for only three days in the past 18 years.
Time is the natural enemy of human beings, but also the natural enemy of feelings.
So people always say that the best way to look at love is to stay in it for a long time.
But to be together all day long, no one can keep our feelings in a state of passionate love. We all need to get used to the cold and hot in our feelings.
Because its normal and the right way to get along.
Love is nothing more than a word: sweet.
Two people stick to each other, but how about going on like this?
The answer is not good. As an individual, people need to have independent space. Psychologist Duncan once proposed that in social occasions, the safe distance between people is 1.2 meters. Beyond this distance, the other party will have a sense of oppression and subconsciously do protection.
Love is the same, too tight, will occupy each others spiritual field, each others space will be compressed.
Love needs a more comfortable way to get along, so many people put forward the requirements of mate selection, the first thing is not stick to people.
This is not irresponsible, many things, far is the scenery, near is the flaw.
 what if there is no freshness after the love period?
The writer Sanmao once said that love falls on the ground, that is, firewood, rice, oil, salt, vegetable and rice.
Love is beautiful, but love is just an emotional condensation, it is separated from life, there is no lasting guarantee.
So, when two people go through the love period, they gradually lose their original freshness. Dont think its the other partys change of heart or estrangement.
Youre just back to normal and moving towards a more stable future.
But the feelings need to be maintained and cant be let alone. The best state for two people is to protect, understand and tolerate each other on an equal intersection line.
This requires two people to exchange their hearts. In ordinary days, they can find common interests and topics, and avoid being isolated in spirit.
All the broken feelings are first disintegrated psychologically, and this kind of psychological care is far higher than that in the period of passionate love, that kind of gluing feeling of you and me.
Based on this situation, we put forward some suggestions. Although we cant return to the sweet period of passionate love, we can guarantee that love can move forward steadily and slowly.
First, both sides should grow together
And this kind of growth, more reflected in the spirit and soul height, that is to say, never give up for love to let oneself learn more.
This is the capital you are loved.
Second, there must be communication
Learn to communicate, you can reduce a lot of unnecessary friction, but also the only way to cultivate feelings.
As we often say, chatting is the best love.
A person who cant give each others future and hope cant be trusted more. Just like in struggle, Xia Lin said to Lu Tao, if you keep working hard, then I will always love you.
In fact, what you can achieve is not the most important thing. I believe that the people who really love you are not trying to achieve fame and benefit, otherwise this kind of love will not be simple, and it is not a pity to lose it.
In other words, you cant succeed, but you cant fail to grow.
Fourth: respect the reality, but do not believe in it
In fact, its the heart of the people.
If two people can leave some space and soil for love to live in the busy life, to experience the hard-earned feeling after being bitter and sweet, on the contrary, they will feel how rare happiness it is to be a couple of less secular couples in the thin world.
So put aside the house, car, ticket, dont bear too much psychological burden, as long as two people are willing to work together, there will be a better life.
The most important thing is that you can love the wind and the water, and the years bring flowers.
After the passionate love, it is bound to enter a dull period, which is not alienation, but two people can finally face the future calmly.
This is a very good thing, because from this moment on, what you are pursuing is everlasting, dry sea and rotten stone.
The words that I said when I was in love are not counted. Only through the beating of life can faith be regarded as an ideal.