Such news is not uncommon. Many girls in the emotional state of mind, clearly do not love, but think that they have been together for many years, break up will affect their reputation, so make up the day, but no feelings of marriage is like an inseparable cage, not only trapped themselves, but also hurt each others heart.
When love is strong, drinking water is sweet, but once love is exhausted, sugar water is bitter.
In todays society, rather than being burdened with fame all their lives, women are no longer looking forward to getting five-star praise from others. What about being an ordinary woman?
Recently, a Japanese media interviewed citizens and found that 62 out of 100 wives were dissatisfied with their husbands.
Newly-married wives complain that their husbands are always addicted to mobile games; middle-aged wives complain that their husbands have been messy and troubled for years; old wives complain that their husbands of the same age are still infatuated with young girls.
Because of their dissatisfaction with their husbands, wives have caused a series of physical diseases, which are also called husband-origin disease.
But even in such a daily complaint marriage, they still choose to go with men.
In the 20th century, Zweig, an Austrian writer, wrote a novel, a letter from a strange woman.
She is crazy about writers, like a peeper to spy on his every move. She will stay up at night and listen to the writersfootsteps in the doorway. She will also turn over the rubbish thrown by writers, pick up a cigarette butt as a treasure. She will give birth to the crystallization of two people when writers do not recognize her and raise their children independently.
But the writer only regards her as a woman who can collude with at will, without nostalgia or restraint.
In the years that followed, she met the writer again and again in the theatre. She longed for the writer to recognize her, but he never did.
She could only remain silent with the child, but eventually the child died, and she would soon die.
She sacrificed her life for the writer, but she did not get any return.
She loves vigorously but obscurely, pitifully and lamentably.
A friend and her husband had been married for three years and worked hard for the family.
Children grow up little by little, husbands career is getting better and better. Friends are tired to take care of their family, but they still feel that their marriage is good. Until she finds out that her husband has gone off the rails, she doesnt understand how the world collapses in an instant.
She cried to her husband and said, If I hadnt resigned, I would have been promoted now, and my salary would have risen a lot. You know how much I paid for this family!
Unbalanced marriages are like unstable scales, shaky and irreversible.
Chinese women often pay attention to virtue and virtue. They feel that they have to take care of their family when they get married. It is inevitable for them to give everything for their family.
Self-sacrifice can be regarded as love, which is the saddest thing in marriage.
Professor shizang, who put forward the term Fuyuan disease, said: 56% of the wives begin to have negative emotions towards their husbands within five years of marriage; 63.7% of the wives answered think right away , think recently , think sooner or later in the question of whether they will consider divorce if they dont consider economic problems ; another 55% considered if the husband dies earlier .
Women often find it difficult to separate emotions from other things and have higher moral requirements for themselves.
But emotion cant be measured by morality, and you dont need to be a moral model. A girl who knows how to pursue her own happiness is a real five star praise woman.
My cousin has been working outside for many years and has been working hard. My family is very anxious.
Later, she and her husband got married under the arrangement of their father. They had no emotional basis and no common language. After marriage, they even committed domestic violence against her.
She wanted to divorce, and her family came to persuade her, without exception, on the grounds that its disgraceful to marry and divorce again, think about your reputation, but cousin still insisted on divorce.
Later, my cousin met a man who really loved herself and gave birth to two lovely babies. She lived happily.
Marriage is a matter of two people, you do not have to live in other peoples evaluation, virtue should also be based on love; and no emotional marriage is like a pool of stagnant water, can not withstand any waves.
Therefore, girls in marriage must bear in mind that blindly self-sacrifice will only make the other party fearless, and marriage must also be in their own hands, you do not need to live in the evaluation of others to let themselves through a bad feeling.
So, how can we save ourselves from the feeling of self-sacrifice? There are several ways to share with you:
1. To have their own business, husband and wife should pay attention to equality. No one has to give up everything for the sake of the family. Only when they get along with each other can they have their own foundation and equal voice in marriage.
2. Dont care about other peoples evaluation. Chinese women have been educated to be gentle and humble since childhood. They have been living in other peoples evaluation for thousands of years. But marriage is based on their own experience and feelings. No one can sympathize with you. Only when you learn not to care about other peoples evaluation and stick to your own ideas, can you get the happiness you deserve.
3. Necessary communication between husband and wife, many people think that couples can understand each others ideas for a long time together. In fact, many contradictions between husband and wife do not occur in communication, you do not understand his meaning, he does not understand your ideas, feelings gradually become cold, couples get along regularly let each other know your thoughts and thoughts, marriage can last.
Marriage needs to be managed, but a marriage of self-sacrifice is not worth nostalgia.
You should learn to think more about yourself, to be kind to yourself, to express your likes and dislikes, instead of just suppressing your emotions.
When you no longer kidnap yourself with the so-called standard of a good woman, and no longer need the five-star praise of other peoples population, you dont have to struggle to be a standard good woman, just an ordinary woman is enough.