I thought she would be happy when I got better and better work and other people recognized me, because after all, I was working for her, but because once I realized that she used to use me, cheat me, and never reuse me.
From that day on, I would not say hello to her, her face was not good, and she was also very guilty. We knew it from the bottom of our hearts. It has been three months since the incident happened. Now when I think of the day when I know the truth by subway, I still cry sadly.
Recently, I thought, in fact, other people have experienced similar things, but can be calm and even pretend to maintain superficial peace, but I really paid, I really can not pretend, at the same time, this matter also affects my work mentality.
Id like to ask if I really did something wrong in my work. And did I have a wrong attitude towards her after this happened? What should I do?
I really dont know about the performance at work, and I cant judge whether you have improper practices. But since you say that you are really wrong in paying, you are also looking for some reasons of your own. Along this line of thinking, I will give you some opinions.
Its not wrong to work hard and perform well. Its normal to find that leaders use their anger and sorrow.
But as you said, maybe other people can be calm, but you are affected so much, the difference is not that other people have a good mind, but that you have a different fundamental understanding of the work.
You have repeatedly mentioned you work for her and she values you very much, which is what you care about very much.
But in fact, these two points you emphasize narrow the nature of the work - you are not working for her, you are working for yourself, she values you should not be your goal, in the company or even in the industry is a development.
Of course, this is not to say that leadership is unimportant, but when you regard the attitude of leadership towards you as the whole focus of this job, you put the cart before the horse.
Its not her who decides your future development, but the growth of your ability and the improvement of your level in this job.
In addition, judging from your reaction, your trust and dependence on leadership is actually beyond the general working relationship.
The relationship between you and your leader is always an enemy and a friend. Your work achievements are part of her credit. Her guidance is the premise of your progress. You have common work goals, which is the side of cooperation.
But your performance is too good, it is a threat to her. She only demonstrates her merits when she erases your achievements. It is also a threat to you. It is a confrontational aspect.
In this relationship, you pay too much, so you feel particularly hurt.
When you shouldnt feel so real, your enthusiasm finally changed into a pot of cold water, but its not entirely bad. Its a good time to wake up.
Take stock of what you have paid in the past two years. Have you ever exchanged for self-improvement? If you are afraid of anything, you can consider changing your job to show your strength. If not, then dont blame the leaders for using you, because you are not strong enough.
As for your attitude towards the leader, you are a little childish. It is inevitable that you cant hide your personal emotions in the workplace. But if you can reposition your relationship with the leader, you will be more rational when dealing with her.